Saturday, May 28, 2016

Garden Cruise... WHAT!?!

It's been so long since I've written that I've neglected to mention I'm a Texas Master Gardener.
Yep, I can now request others to call me Master.
Ha! As if that's going to happen.
But hey, there's perks. Like conferences on cruise ships.
Gardening on the ocean?
Yep, I'll be attending 8 hours of continuing education while heading to Cozumel.
Sweet deal!
I even convinced the husband to go.
I know, arm twisting was tough. ;)
He's interested in a few of the classes too, like Beverages from the Garden and the Wine and Viticulture classes. 

If you've been reading this dusty old blog, then you might remember I did a whole 30 that turned to 90 days of clean eating. 
In the process I lost 35lbs.
That was nearly 2-years ago. 

WOW! Time flies when you're old.

Anyway, in those 2 years since I've allowed some things to creep back in to my diet. Namely sugar and bread. Granted, not like before, but it's still there. And because of it, I've put 15lbs back on. 
I try to stay positive, because HEY, at least I've kept 20lbs off... right? 
Yep, BUT I still had so far to go. 

Okay, enough of that. 

Gardening + Cruise = Weight Loss
Y'all can see how that all goes hand in hand now, right? Of course you do!

So the countdown has been made, spreadsheets started and Pinterest boards are filling up. 
You don't work 12-years in research and not pick up a few habits.

So once the deposit was made, passports were sorted and the list of excursions and on board packages were researched and logged I started to look at the countdown chart and realized;

"OMG I have to wear a frakin' bathing suit. WTH did I just sign up for?!"

After the initial shock, cold sweats and hyperventilation was done, I started mathing. ;)

I've 334 days, 47.5 weeks and I'd like to weigh what my License to Carry has me listed as. 
Um, yeah, it's not been updated since I first qualified.

That was 21 years ago, a 12-year sedentary office job, 4 moves, and 3 kids ago.
Talk about denial! 

So I'm writing it down. 
I'm blogging again.
I'm watching EVERYTHING that I eat.
And I plan on working out

No! Really, I am. I even did a quick workout today even though I'm fighting the last bit of school cooties the kids brought home.

Oh and that, it's officially Summer Break for the kids. I'm not really sure it that's going to make this process easier or harder, I guess that really just depends on me.
Gah, adulting sucks!

So, my plan for this blog?
Mostly to track my progress.
What else? Not really sure yet.
I'll just play it by ear. 

I've already done the food photo blogs.
Did the recipe thing.
And made motivational tools.

I know I'll be updating the food and work out boards on Pinterest.
With the PC now in my bedroom and the kids taking over the house, it's easier to work out in here and lock the door. Because seriously, yoga and kids... NO! 

AND... weights. It's time. Sure, I still have permanent joint damage thanks to sports and unsupervised weight lifting. But whatever. I'm not bitter. ;)

I should maybe add one of those widget for weight loss. Surely they're all over the place. I already have the cruise countdown. What's one more thing in the sidebar?

So this is officially day 1. 
I've 333 to go. 
To my friends, please don't make cookies for the next 47.5 weeks!  

Sunday, May 22, 2016

Victory was Certain

I dragged their lifeless bodies across the newly leveled fields. Each one inadvertently picking up pieces from those who'd fallen before them. These two were the last. The giants among the masses. They stood tall and proud, certain nothing could harm them.
But they forgot who their master was. They took on a role they had not earned and in doing so led many others astray. Like a mutinous crew seeing only the port before them and not the ocean and its treasures beyond.
It was my job to bring things back to order. It was a task I loathed but knew had to be executed. If not I'd have been overrun and all my years of work would have been for nothing.
And so I did what had to be done.
With blades sharpened and nothing more than a thin protective shield to guard me against their allies, I went forth. 

Within minutes of entering their territories, their colleagues met me. Alien in appearance, they were fast and adaptable. I knew some would make it through my shield. They are a plague on society. So their death brought me great pleasure.

As I got closer I was greeted by their children. So small and fragile, easily plucked from the earth and tossed to the side. This... this I did not enjoy. Though I knew my enemies had to be thoroughly annihilated, it brought me no pleasure to end the next generation.
I moved forwards.

Getting closer to my goal I was forced to run the gauntlet. So many of my friends turned foe, each one grabbing at me, cutting me, leaving behind bloody reminders of relationships that had spoiled from neglect. So much of it was my fault, which hurt the most.
But they fell, all of them. One by one. My blades cut through them. Yet it was no easy task. Each one bigger and stronger. My hands, my arms, my shoulders and back, they all hurt, but I could not, WOULD NOT quit.

And then I was there, standing before the last two holdouts. The giants. Taking them down would be no easy task. But necessary if I was to succeed.
But I was tired.
So many battles had already been fought and all I wanted to do was rest. However, I knew if I stopped at this point, chances are I’d never go back.
And so I pushed forward. Grabbing a larger blade, not sure if I could take them down. But not showing fear either.
They both fought long and hard. The cuts and bruises I'd sustained earlier were nothing compared to the ones they left me. They were strong, solid, unmoving. Unlike the ones before who bent easily to my will. These put up a mighty fight.
But I could not lose and so I pressed forward to victory.

Tossing their lifeless bodies into a mass grave, piled high with my enemies, who were once friends. Tears mingled with sweat as I watched the cart pull away. I wondered if I'd been a better master, maybe none of this would have happened. Perhaps I could have tried harder to work with them. But it didn't matter now. I had a plan and they refused to work with me.

Under a warm flow of water, I reflected on the day's victory. Washing away dirt and debris, I hoped to never have to fight my friends and their allies again. But I am certain that as a master, I will be forced to make these difficult decisions again.

Because the truth is my job is never done.

Tales of a Master Gardener